Kid Jokes

Submitted By “Thanatos”

What happens when a clown has flatulency?   It smells funny.

What do you name a dog with no legs?  Nothing, he won’t come when you call him anyway!!

What do you call a fish without an eye?  A fsh!!!!

How many blonde jokes are there?  None, they are all true!!!

Why do they bury Attorney’s 10 feet under?  Because deep down they’re really good people.

What do you get when you put Spice Girls in the toaster?  Pop Tarts.

How many programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?  None, its a hardware problem!

What did Adam say to Eve at Christmas ?  ITS CHRISTMAS EVE !!!!

Haircuts – Men vs Women

Submitted By “Thanatos”

Women’s version:

Woman 2: Oh!  You got a haircut!  That’s so cute!

Woman 1: Do you think so?  I wasn’t sure when she gave me the mirror.  I mean, you don’t think it’s too fluffy looking?

Woman 2: Oh Heavens no!  No, it’s perfect.  I’d love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide.  I’m pretty much stuck with this stuff I think.

Woman 1: Are you serious?  I think your face is adorable.  And you could easily get one of those layer cuts – that would look so cute I think.  I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck.

Woman 2: Oh – that’s funny!  I would love to have your neck!  Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line.

Woman 1: Are you kidding?  I know girls that would love to have your shoulders.  Everything drapes so well on you.  I mean, look at my arms – see how short they are?  If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me so much easier.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Men’s version:

Man 2:  Haircut?

Man 1:  Yeah.